HONK IF YOUR SOUL BELONGS TO VAIL RESORTS

$7.00

Celebrate your spiritual surrender to corporate skiing with this darkly honest declaration of mountain town feudalism. Perfect for anyone who's traded their moral compass for an Epic Pass™.

FEATURES:

  • Soul-binding vinyl (like your employee contract)

  • Eternal adhesive (just like your commitment to Vail Resorts)

  • Weather-resistant (unlike your dignity)

  • Professionally printed (by underpaid labor)

IDEAL PLACEMENT OPTIONS:

  • Your vehicle/indentured housing unit

  • The staff locker you're not supposed to live in

  • Your "vintage" pre-Vail local mountain sticker collection

  • The back of your mandatory name tag

Size: 4" x 3" (bigger than your employee housing allocation)

PERFECT FOR:

  • Disgruntled lift operators

  • Former local business owners

  • Recently acquired resort employees

  • Anyone who says "Epic" unironically now

  • That person who remembers the "before times"

WARNING: May cause:

  • Spontaneous honking in employee parking lots

  • Knowing sighs from ski patrol

  • Confusion from Texan tourists

  • Uncomfortable laughter from resort management

  • Sudden urges to check corporate stock prices

Note: 10% of your soul will be deducted for each sticker purchased (standard Vail Resorts terms & conditions apply)

Celebrate your spiritual surrender to corporate skiing with this darkly honest declaration of mountain town feudalism. Perfect for anyone who's traded their moral compass for an Epic Pass™.

FEATURES:

  • Soul-binding vinyl (like your employee contract)

  • Eternal adhesive (just like your commitment to Vail Resorts)

  • Weather-resistant (unlike your dignity)

  • Professionally printed (by underpaid labor)

IDEAL PLACEMENT OPTIONS:

  • Your vehicle/indentured housing unit

  • The staff locker you're not supposed to live in

  • Your "vintage" pre-Vail local mountain sticker collection

  • The back of your mandatory name tag

Size: 4" x 3" (bigger than your employee housing allocation)

PERFECT FOR:

  • Disgruntled lift operators

  • Former local business owners

  • Recently acquired resort employees

  • Anyone who says "Epic" unironically now

  • That person who remembers the "before times"

WARNING: May cause:

  • Spontaneous honking in employee parking lots

  • Knowing sighs from ski patrol

  • Confusion from Texan tourists

  • Uncomfortable laughter from resort management

  • Sudden urges to check corporate stock prices

Note: 10% of your soul will be deducted for each sticker purchased (standard Vail Resorts terms & conditions apply)